Clueless at the Scratch Bar

Sometimes I like to just show up at a restaurant without knowing anything about it; surprised by what I find; never knowing what hidden treasures lurk.  But if you do that at the Scratch Bar you’ll be totally fk’ed.  Don’t get me wrong the place is awesome.  Just don’t go in cold.  First, you need to know that you’re gonna drop a minimum of $400 minimum on two people.  Second you need to fast for two days; there’s only like 20 courses.  Which if I had spent two minutes on the internet I would have known.  But I like surprises.  Sorta.  Kinda.  Okay, fine, nobody does, and I was just being f’n lazy.  I was looking for a good place to impress a woman I’m dating, and someone said it would be perfect.  Actually, now that I think about it, it’s probably even worse that I didn’t check out the restaurant to which I was taking my date.  Especially since here were 20 courses and you might want to warn someone about that before taking them there.

The meal itself was outstanding.  Any one of the small plates could have been expanded to a full meal and done the job.  The hit list included: Trout, Blue Fin, Spot Prawn, Cuttlefish, Leek, Sweetbreads, Hamachi, Foie Gras, Quail, Lobster, Joshu Wagu, Cheese, Chestnut, Bone Marrow, Chocolate.  And the ambiance, hipster cool, but not annoying.  The meal started out in the enclosed bar.  Very speakeasy, and we were the only ones that is that added to the mystique.  Even the popcorn starter was good.  But things really got going on the mixology scale with hibiscus champagne float with our savory lemon meringue, and some kind of crazy gin infused maple mojito something with our charcuterie.

By the 14th course my girl was ready to bounce.  It was kind of a bummer because after the 10th course, dollar signs started to go off in my head.  What had I gotten myself into?  There were no prices to be found because there were no MENUS!  Not that I was making her stay to eat her keep, but I had to finish what I started.  It became a death match.  Either I was going to make it through this meal or it would kill me.  After the 14th course, I let her just sample each new tasting.  I’m not a monster, and to prove it we’re still together.  That’s love.